Tears of Pain and Joy

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The same day I get a new hairstyle that celebrates a time of renewal in my life my Mom found out she’s losing her hair.  All of it.  To chemo.

A few years ago I had to have parts of my head shaved for brain surgery & had a horrible time with my hair growing back.  I looked like Joe Dirt and felt so awkward.  I cannot imagine what she and other people going through chemo feel.  
Cancer scares me.  
Chemo frightens me to the bone.
These two words make me want to run, scream and cry.  It’s something I cannot control.  I don’t have the answer.  I can’t do anything but pray.  God can heal, I know He can, but He may not.

That’s the tough part I’m praying through.  Will you pray too?  Pray for joy in the midst of this chaotic and emotional time.  Pray that she will be healed.  Pray for wellness in the midst of the poison that will run through her body to kill the cancer.

At the same time I feel joy to have her here and joy in Christ.  I purchased “Choose Joy” Bracelets from Ashley of LilBlueBoo because my Mom has been talking about Joy in the moment, just as Ashley has.  She wants to have a mini party at the salon when her hair comes off in April.  Tears of Pain and Tears of Joy at the same time.  

Hair or no hair, she’s still beautiful and we’re going to make a special moment out of it.  She’s going to rock her new look like every other survivor!
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. ~ Phillippians 4:7

So, I’m praying for my Mom and a few others.  Do you have someone you’d like prayer for? Just leave their first name and myself and others can pray for them. 

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  1. Choose joy! Yes, such a wonderful reminder and I am sure it’s hard in the midst of what your mother is going through. Thanks for sharing. Will continue to pray.

  2. V, I’m praying for you and your Mom!!! 🙂 What an amazing decision that she has made to choose joy in all of this!

  3. Such a beautiful choice. Joy. I will be praying for you and your mother during this time. It’s so wonderful that you have each other.

  4. Prayin for you both …. While I have no words … I have prayer and tears for your sweet family … You are both beautiful … Love u both xoxo

  5. i’m so sorry v.

    i’ll pray for you. she’s so beautiful, i knew she was you mother as soon as i saw her. hang in there, call me if you can 😉

  6. Praying for you and your family: Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. 2 Cor 1:3-4

  7. God bless you as you gather the strength to help hold your mom up through this. Choose Joy indeed! I am praying for a cure – praying for comfort – praying for perspective. God bless you all as you make this journey together.

  8. I am not a very religious person. Not in the sense that many are anyway. But, please have faith. I can honestly say that when I couldn’t muster up prayers because I was so angry, I had faith in medicine. I had faith in my Dad. I had faith in my family. I had faith in the team of doctors working around the clock to keep my Dad alive. You’re exactly right when you say we don’t have control over these scary things—but those doctors and nurses have a whole lot more control than we do! They’re amazing and they KNOW what they’re doing! Have faith!

    Be strong for your mom, but not too strong. Be supportive and positive, but also let the anger and inability to understand “why” shine through. Feel all the emotions, but don’t let them take over your life. Be there for her, but take care of yourself, too!

    Good luck you to you and your family—from someone seen first-hand the miracles of medicine.

  9. Thanks for sharing, V. I will continue to pray. Please add my friend, Tracey, to your list, too! Much love!

  10. I’m so sorry to hear about your mom. I’m praying for her and your fam during this time!
    Thanks for offering to pray, I actually have two people: my husband’s grandma Barbara who was just diagnosed with lung cancer and started chemo last week and my dad is currently recovering from back surgery.

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