Let’s Get Real

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First off, I need to give a BIG, BIG thank you to Virginia for letting me take over her blog today…she really doesn’t know what’s she gotten herself into!
Anyways, I think Virginia and I are long lost sisters.  Case in point: I pretty much bought everything she listed on her Instagram sale because it was totally up my alley.  Her taste in fabrics and love for all things vintage is totally my language.  We could do some serious antiquing and fabric shopping, I just know it!
Now, back to the reason I’m here – a guest post!  My name is Lena, and I blog over at Life with LeeLee and B…plus Annie Louise!  I’ve been married to my handsome hubby, B, for over 5 years.  We have a precious and wild toddler, Annie Louise, who keeps our schedule and our hearts FULL.  My blog is just a view into our crazy beautiful life…I hope you’ll stop by and read along!

It’s time to get real, y’all.  I have a big confession, like huge.

I’m nothing like the mama I thought I was going to be before I actually had a child.
There, I said it.  I feel better already!
You see, before I gave birth to that adorable 9 pound, 2 ounces, head full of dark hair baby, I had an idea in my head of what kind of mama I was going to be to our Annie Louise.
And today?  I’m nothing like her.
Here are a few “rules” I had pre-Annie Louise:
  • I will not allow my kids to snack or eat in the car.
  • My kids will only eat the most nutritious snacks and meals.
  • I will not have a room totally devoted to housing toys (i.e., a playroom).
  • I will never, ever, ever have a television or dvd player in my car.
  • My daughter will not be obsessed with princesses, more importantly, Disney princesses.
  • My kids will NEVER sleep in the bed with me.  End of story.
There you have it.  Do you think less of me as a mama?  Probably not, or at least I hope not.

That’s the thing with being a mama – we have this idea of what we want to be.  This perfectly ironed and pressed, tied up with a bow dream.  But then this wonderful little being comes into our lives, and everything changes.

So what if it looks like a giant bag of goldfish exploded in my car?  Does it bother you that I turned our only spare bedroom into an adorable and whimsical room to house all the toys? Who cares that getting a full night’s sleep means sometimes my toddler sleeps in the bed with me? Sure, my pantry is full of animal crackers and cookies and chips.  And yes, I’m pretty sure we watch “Beauty and the Beast” every time we are in the car.
Does that make me a failure?  I pray it doesn’t!
Instead of thinking of myself as a disappointment because the way I parent isn’t exactly how I dreamt it would be, I’m going to think of all the fun and the many, many memories that have come from breaking my own rules!
So, to all my mamas out there, don’t beat yourself up.  Celebrate each and every one of your milestones and successes…you deserve it!

What things did you SWEAR you would never do as a parent, but they are totally a part of your life now?

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  1. I think we need to hold out on our lists of always and never until we actually parent. And then still hold them loosely. Because what works with one child, or in one circumstance, totally bombs in another.

    • So so so true! I think it’s important to cut ourselves a little slack, too. My goal as a mama is to do the best I can…every single day! Thanks for your comment!

  2. My friends an I always joke about “when we knew everything about parenting” aka before we had kids! I swore we would never do barney or elmo, no tv actually. Psh! When I got pregnant with my second elmo saved me every time morning sickness hit! Which was every day all day till 23 weeks!

    • Bless your heart! Morning sickness is awful, I’m sure it’s even worse WITH a toddler! I think it’s really easy for us to say what we’re going to do/not going to do when we haven’t even experienced anything! How naive of us!

  3. Oh my goodness, how much time do you have? 🙂 There are so many ways that motherhood in reality does not line up with the motherhood I dreamt of. And you know what? The real thing is so. much. better. Yes, I have put my kids on backpack leashes. Yes, the TV babysat my daughter far too often during the twins’ first year (and now it’s the only way I get dinner made!). No, our meals are not always nutritious. No, our milk is not organic. And yes, I lose my temper and later weep with guilt. I am a mess. But I am a mama. And I am so grateful for that… and for grace.

    p.s. – Chuck E. Cheese!

    • Virginia Davidson says:

      Ha ha the backpack leash! I have one in my car to keep my daughter safe in large crowds when she was a runner. I haven’t taken it out yet, but I remember the looks I would get. I’d rather get looks than loose my daughter or worse. & oh boy do I have to apologize when I nip at my daughter. She calls me out now! So glad you stopped by and shared more!

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